Guilt, Sin & Condemnation

Not too long ago I was continually beating myself up for saying and doing the very things which I vowed not to do. Things like, raising my voice when my husband and I are having an argument, talking negatively about my husband’s manager, mentally criticizing my body and comparing it to other women’s bodies etc. I hoped that these bad habits would just disappear once I admitted that they were indeed sin. However, it seemed the more determined I was to overcome these bad habits on my own the more I gave into them. I started to feel hopeless; the way a gardener would feel if she were to wake up one morning to a garden jam-packed with weeds instead of the flowers she was sure she saw budding a few days before. I literally wanted to run away, but Instead, I distracted myself with anything and everything to keep me from turning to the inner voice inside that I sensed would lead me to repent for my sins and receive Gods grace. The truth was, I didn’t feel like asking for forgiveness for the same thing over and over, I was starting to feel like a broken record. Why should I get another chance, I knew that while I was doing those things that they were wrong. How can I, be a so called 'born again' Christian, yet still habitually fall into the same sin temptations?

 Can anyone relate to this? Have you ever ‘vowed not to do something’ or ‘be better tomorrow’ only to find yourself doing the exact thing you promised you weren’t going to do? Well I got my revelation on this subject just weeks following the shame-guilt-condemnation party I was throwing for myself. To my surprise, I found out that the apostle Paul had the same struggle as I did. In his own words, he says

“I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do, I do not do, but what I hate I do….For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do-this I keep on doing” (Romans 7:17-19)

 Paul is talking about his current spiritual condition and describing his attitude towards sin (he does not want to sin, and he hates sin), yet he continues to do the very things that he does not want to do. Finally! Somebody who understands what I am going through. How could I have not known that one of the most devoted apostles of Jesus struggled with the very same character flaw as I was struggling with. Let’s see what Paul says next.

“Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is the sin living in me that does it” (Romans 7:20)

Wow. Okay so If Paul says that it is not him who sins, then who sins? Well ladies, I think it’s time for Christian vocabulary lesson 101. Basically, we are all born sinners. The Bible says that no-one is without sin.(Rom 3:23) We can thank Adam and Eve for that. So because we were born with this ‘sin nature’, it is our natural fleshly desire to do things that are contrary to God’s will. We want to stare at the super skinny woman walking down the street and criticize, compare and envy her all at the same time. Our flesh wants to gossip with everyone else about the new employee at work who smells bad and whose outfits never match. It’s our flesh who sometimes imagines really horrible things happening to our enemies.

However, when we are Born Again (accept Jesus as our Lord and Savior), we are given the gift of the Holy Spirit to help deliver us out of the temptations that our ‘sinful nature’ desires. This is why we feel ‘convicted’ by the Holy Spirit, when we do something that is contrary to the Word of God. As paul described, even though the Holy Spirit is alive and active in us, we still live in a flawed body that is a slave to the sinful desires of our flesh.

Do you get it? So it is like we have two people living inside of us waging war against one another. The Spirit is leading us towards life and righteousness, and the flesh has its own evil desires which inevitably lead to death. So what Paul is saying is, stop beating yourself up. It is not the real you who is doing it, it is the sin that is living in you that does it out of habit. If your attitude towards sin is that of a believer (you hate sin, you don’t want to do it) then don’t condemn yourselves, you are on the right path.

“So you see how it is: my new life tells me to do right, but the old nature that is still inside me loves to sin” Romans 7:21-23

Hah. Well said Paul. I feel the same way. Just the other day I was feeling supernaturally filled with joy and I was telling my husband how I felt so connected to the H.S. Seconds later, Andrew told me that before he left the gym his teammates were saying something in Czech to him to bug him. He later found out they were saying “Say Hi to your sexy wife, bla bla bla”. Just as fast as the words came off of his tongue, the rush of flattery went straight to my ego and my mind instantly began planning what outfit I would wear to his next game to maintain this new profile as Andrews ‘sexy wife’. So pathetic, I know. But thank God I was feeling connected to the Holy Spirit that day because I was soon reminded that ‘seeking male attention’ is a part of my past, my old self, my ‘sinful nature’. I’m not going to lie, it took a minute or two to slay the egotistical thought but as soon as I did, I was able to redirect my thoughts to the man sitting next to me and give thanks to God for blessing me with such a wonderful husband.

So now that we know that there is indeed a battle to feed our ‘sinful nature’ that rages within Christ followers, Is there any hope? Does sin always defeat the sons and daughters of God? Of course not. Paul says,

 “Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? Thank God the answer is found in Jesus Christ our Lord” (Romans 7:24-25 NLT)

  Jesus Christ has died for our sins and even though we are in this fleshly, decomposing, sin-filled-nature of a body, if we have received the Holy Spirit then we are no longer slaves to sin. He paid the price, so that we are delivered from condemnation. Paul says,   

“There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1)

How could I have so easily forgotten this biblical truth? After reading this I sensed the Lord speaking to me through his Holy Spirit, saying “Jaycee, even when you are failing, and falling into the temptation of sin, I still accept you and love you more than you could ever imagine. Don’t hide from your mistakes, but come to me and I will cleanse you, trust in me and I will make your paths straight. Whether or not you see it, I am changing you from glory to glory”. I was so humbled to feel 100% accepted for who I am by this Amazing God. However, I wondered why I my first instincts were to run away from God, time after time, when I would fail in my attempts to be good. Of course, I had to go back to the beginning.

Just as I had thought. The sin cycle of tormenting ourselves with guilt, shame, and condemnation come from none other than our great ancestors Adam and Eve. The very first thing Adam and Eve did after they ate the forbidden fruit (which was against the will of God) in the Garden of Eden was try to run away from God, and hide from Him. In the words of Adam “I hid from you because I was afraid”. He was afraid of God because He knew he had done the very thing he knew he was not supposed to do. Rightfully so, I would be afraid to be the first human being to commit the first sin. However, because of the ultimate sacrifice Jesus made, we are called to come boldly to the throne of grace. Yet, for some of us, we still insist on running away, or hiding from God when we screw up and this is because we mistakenly think that God is the one heaping the guilt, shame and condemnation on us. However, this couldn’t be further than the truth. I love the way John Burke, Author or “Soul Revolution” puts it:

“God does what he does in Christ, so that if we’re willing to receive it, we can know that even as we fail, He doesn’t leave us or condemn us….but if we are afraid God condemns us, we will hide from him and fall farther away”

Ladies, do not fall into the enemy’s trap of accepting the feelings of guilt, condemnation and shame. These are all lies, and it is one of the oldest tricks in the enemy’s book to get us to stay disconnected from God. Why? Because when we are disconnected from God, we will, out of habit, give into our sin nature, Instead of running towards God and trusting in His Holy Spirit to change us.

So where does this leave us?

Let’s take you on a trip down memory lane. Particularly to those of you who participated in the “Stop-Gossip Challenge”. Almost everyone who overcame the temptation to gossip, one time or another throughout their week, confessed that in those moments they were fully connected to the Holy Spirit. They could hear the gentle warning when they were about to be tempted, and it was in those moments that they chose to follow the guidance of the Holy Spirit. A few of the women said, that even when they did (out of habit) dabble in gossip they could feel the Holy Spirit reminding them that what they were doing was wrong. Back to what Paul said previously, when you gave into the very sin in which you hate to do, it is your sinful nature that does it, and not the ‘real you’ who does it. Again, don't beat yourself up!

So is Paul giving us excuses to sin, and saying that I can consciously sin, and not feel bad about it because I know that God will forgive me? Of course not, and Paul addresses this by saying “So should we continue in our sin, so that grace may abound? No, God forbid” (Romans 6:15) . You aren't going to recieve peace or forgiveness for robbing a bank if you fully intend on robbing another bank the next day. God's word can not be mocked. He knows our intentions and as knows our attitude towards sin. As it is written "Men looks at the outward appearance, but God looks at our heart". (1 Sam 16:7). There is no loopholes when it comes to obeying the word of God so don’t even think about it sister.

So here is where our 'intentions' come into play

Paul says, “For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the spirit, have their minds set on what the spirit desires” (Romans 8:5)

The moments in which each woman overcame the temptation to gossip, occurred when they were connected to that inner voice. They had intentionally set their minds on what the Spirit desired. It is only then, that we can overcome temptation. Trying harder simply won’t work. When we are disconnected to the Holy Spirit (we don't intentionally seek his guidance), we will, out of habit give into the sinful nature that lives in us and naturally have our minds set on the things of the flesh. It is a Biblical fact.

                                                     Conclusion

What Paul has taught me, and now you, is that yes, even as Christians, at times, we will sin, for all the reasons stated above. (Sinful nature, desires of our flesh, being born into a corrupt world, etc) Yet, if we are led by the Holy Spirit, like I was that day in the car with my husband, and like the women who succeeded throughout the week in the stop-gossip challenge, we learned that we can overcome such temptations. Even when we fail, and do the very sin we hoped not to do, for example, the women who failed throughout the week in the Stop-Gossip challenge. We know that we are still on the right path towards righteousness no matter how many times we, out of habit, give into that sin, because it was our attitude toward sin that matters, not the sin itself.  So please remember, that God is not wagging his finger from the clouds of heaven every time you screw up. No, He is saying 'Come to me as you are, we need to work together, you cannot overcome the sinful nature on your own, you need to walk with me, and stay connected to me'. It is through the sacrifice of Jesus, that we have hope in overcoming the very sins that dominate over us. Women of faith now understand that Victory over our sinful nature comes by intentionally re-directing our minds towards following the guidance of the Holy Spirit that dwells inside of us.