8 Things You Should Know About Loving Your Enemy

1.    Forgive them

     Before you attempt to love your enemy, you need to forgive them in your heart for what they have done to you. When Jesus was on the cross looking at his ‘enemies’ casting lots over his clothes, he prayed “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do” Matthew 6:12. Have you forgiven your enemy? The easiest way to know if you have actually forgiven someone is to monitor your mind and your mouth. If you are constantly thinking or talking (gossiping) about the thing(s) they did to hurt you in the past, then more than likely you have not forgiven that person yet. If Satan can get you to talk, and even meditate on past offences, I can guarantee you are going to have a much harder time loving that person the next time you see them.  The Bible says love takes no account to the evil done to it, so stop keeping track of all the mean things people have done to you and taking every opportunity to talk negatively about them with your friends. Remember, when you forgive someone you are releasing a prisoner, and then you will realize, the prisoner you set free was yourself. To forgive is to love.

2.    Jesus said Love, not Like

     There has been a study that has shown that 10% of people who ever meet you will not like you, and vice versa. I can admit to this. I mean, some people I just don’t generally click-with. They have different personalities and character traits that just seem to clash with mine. I think every woman can admit to the fact that we aren’t going to be fond of everyone we meet. That’s fine, Jesus never said we have to like everybody. What he did say, is that we are to love everybody as we love ourselves, including our neighbor and our enemy. Does that mean that we have to feel affection towards them? Call them up to see if they want to hang out? No, loving your enemy simply means that we treat them the same as we would with someone we like. We must be kind and respectful towards them, putting their needs before ours. Not treating them badly to their face, behind their back, or in our thought life. It means we focus on the good qualities of that person, instead of the negative. It means that we keep our mouth shut and resist the temptation to tell others how much we dislike the person, and all the reasons why we dislike them. Instead, we should be asking God to show us how to love this person better. We should be writing down and meditating on every good quality that person has. Once you put those loving thoughts in your mind, they will seep into your heart and eventually those thoughts will come out of your mouth. The Bible says “Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks” (Matthew 12:34). So if you can begin speaking nicely about this person, eventually your attitude towards that person will be sincere in love. We love our enemy with our thoughts, our words and our actions.

3.    The Lord is your vindicator.

     As I mentioned earlier it is our natural instinct as flawed human beings to want to retaliate against the person who has wronged us. In my previous post, I shared my struggle to overcome the countless temptations to get even with my enemy in the midst of her verbal spats. Although I resisted the temptation to fight fire with fire to her face, behind her back I took vengeance into my own hands…or rather in my own words. Here is a little recap of the aftermath; “Somehow I knew that in my heart, I made things worse for myself by gossiping about her. Not only did I feel less peaceful, but I sensed the Holy Spirit convicting me of my personal vendetta to get even with Jennifer and how this had replaced the trust I had in God to justify my case.” Talking badly about our enemy is the number one way that we feel justified for vindicating ourselves. However, the Bible says countless times that we are to not curse our enemies, but rather bless them (Lev 19:16) and that holding a grudge and gossiping about them will make us less peaceful (James 3:8). We need to be like David, when he found himself at yet another standoff with King Saul, who had been trying to kill him for years. Moments after he spares Saul’s life for the second time, David says to Saul;

   “'I will not do harm to my Lord, for he is the Lord's anointed king.' See, my king, see the skirt of your robe. I cut it off to show you that I would do you no harm, though you are hunting after me to kill me. May the Lord judge between you and me, and may the Lord do justice for me upon you; but my hand shall not touch you." 1 Sam 24:12-15

If David would have stored up bitterness and anger in his heart towards Saul, there is no doubt that he would have probably given into the temptation to attack Saul. Instead, David surrenders all his worries unto the Lord and trusts that God will plead his case and judge Saul according to the evil he has done towards him. Some of you reading this desperately need to start trusting God to settle your cases, instead of being the judge of everyone around you, and every war you find yourself in. We need to stop taking vengeance by talking negatively and ruining the reputations of our enemies. It doesn’t matter which way we go about attacking our enemy, we will never be justified or have a clean conscience unless we do what David did and allow God to be our vindicator. One of my favorite scriptures to rehearse (in my mind) around my enemy are the words David spoke the day he spared Saul’s life:

 “May the Lord Judge between you and me, for my hand will not strike you, my mouth will not curse you and my thoughts will not think evil of you. God is my vindicator” 1 Sam 24:15 (emphasis mine).

When we put our faith in God to vindicate us, we are trusting that He is a better justice maker than we are. This opens the door for Him to come in and settle our cases, but when we put our trust in ourselves and retaliate, we close that door on God.

4.    It is not easy

     After Jesus gave us this radical commandment to love our enemy he says, “What reward will you get by loving those who love you….and by greeting your own people? What are you doing more than others?” Matt 5:46-48. What he is pointing out is that loving people who love us in return, is easy. Moreover, Jesus is saying that loving your enemy is a challenge. You see, as flawed human beings, it is our natural response to want to get even, fight fire with fire, and withdraw our love from those who mistreat us. In my personal experience it was not easy to think loving thoughts about my enemy, let alone sincerely pray and look for opportunities to bless her. However, I can say, that as we crucify our own flesh, and look to the Holy Spirit for guidance, it gets easier and easier to love those, who are hard to love.

5.    Trust Gods Timing and His Will-

     "God has made everything beautiful in its own timing” Ecclesiastes 3:11. If you are expecting to change your enemy into a better person by loving them, chances are that you will exhaust yourself trying, like I did. One day after a failed attempt to get an enemy of mine to be nice to me, I broke down to my husband saying “I just don’t get it, the Bible says that we overcome evil with good, but I haven’t really seen a breakthrough in her life. It almost seems as if she hasn’t been affected at all by my light”. Then Andrew said something that spoke volumes to my heart, “Jaycee, God said that we overcome evil with good, he said the light would flood the darkness, but he didn’t give you a timeframe. We don’t know or understand Gods timing, but you need to trust that his timing is right”. If you are waiting on God to convict someone of their bad behavior, you need to sit tight and trust that everything will work out on Gods watch, not yours. In the meantime, the Bible says to “Pray for those who persecute you and continually use you”  (1 Thessalonians 5: 17-18). The bible wouldn’t tell us to pray for our enemy if it didn’t generate some sort of change within them. The reason we are called to pray for our enemies is because there is power in prayer. The Bible also says that there is power when two or more people are gathered together in prayer. So why not get in agreement with one of your Christian friends and ask them to pray with you about your enemy. Have faith in God.

6.    God is testing you

     Try to remind yourself that everything happens for a reason. “What Satan meant for evil, God will turn out for good” (Genesis 50:20). One of the Devil’s goals is to cause conflict and destroy relationships between people, and if he can get you to hate someone, then he thinks he has won. Don’t let him win!!!Try to remind yourself that God is not only seeking to change your enemy into a better person, but He has allowed this person to come onto your path to produce some sort of fruit in your life. Maybe it is to teach you humility, patience, kindness or to work on your love walk. God will not allow you to be tested with more than you can handle, so remember that God is with you, watching you and rooting for you to pass this test.  As it is written “we are all, being transformed into His image, from glory to glory” 2 Corinthians 3:18.   So praise God knowing that He is offering you an opportunity to grow from who you are now, into someone better. With each temptation you overcome, your character is changing from glory to glory, so that you may reflect to love of Christ, and be made perfect in His love.

7.Humble yourself and acknowledge your wrongs 

The Bible says “clothe yourself with humility towards one another for God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble” 1 peter 5:5. If there is conflict going on between you and your enemy, why not be the first one to say sorry. God will give you grace, and the Bible says all peacemakers will be blessed. In some circumstances, it can be really challenging to humble yourself before the person who has really hurt you. In my previous post, I share my very first humbling experience in the midst of the wrath of my enemy.  As soon as I made the decision not to retaliate, I was able to humbly acknowledge my wrongs, and sincerely apologize for hurting her feelings. I can tell you the honest to God truth, clothing yourself in humility towards your enemy is one of the most rewarding things you can do, especially in the midst of their wrath. I received Gods peace, grace, and a clear conscience as I walked away, knowing that I had been obedient to the Word of God. Obtaining a humble attitude in this situation, means honestly answering the following question: Have I done anything to hurt my enemy? If you can’t think of any on your own, ask God to reveal to you the way(s) you have wronged your enemy. The Bible says that you are to humble yourself before God, but it also says that if your “brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift”(Matt 5:24).  So be the bigger person, get off your high horse, eat a big slice of humble pie, acknowledge your wrongs, apologize to your enemy and be BLESSED!

8. If you have the opportunity to Bless your Enemy, DO IT!!

 “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink” Romans 12:21 Not only does the bible say that blessing your enemy will bring them to shame, but it says that God will reward you with a blessing (Proverbs 25:21,22). It is really difficult for your enemy to continue mistreating you, if you show them that it doesn’t bother you. They will be confused, almost annoyed that their bad behavior isn’t rubbing off on you because what they really want is for you to sink down to the same level as they are. When you bless them, in any way, even by just saying hello and treating them the same as everyone else, it brings shame upon them. They Bible puts it like this “for by doing this, you will heap burning coals on their head” Rom 20:21. What this represented, back in those days, was heaping shame upon that person. As you may have read in my previous post, I had an opportunity to bless my enemy. Although she may not see it as a blessing, I was able to give something away in order for her needs to be put before mine. This has resulted in an abundant amount of blessings in my life and I am so thankful that I obeyed the prompting of the Holy Spirit to Bless my enemy. “Do not return evil for evil, but on the contrary, blessings. Knowing that you were called to inherit a blessing” 1 Peter 3:9. Why not ask God today if there is anything you can do to bless your enemy. Maybe you can say hello, start a conversation, bring them a coffee, or offer a sincere compliment. If you ask the Holy Spirit, he will give you some pretty radical ideas, I’m sure of it.  All that is left to do is to Rejoice! Rejoice in the fact that we have been called to inherit the blessing that comes with loving and blessing our enemies.



Jehovah Jireh: God is my Provider

A few years ago I took a 4 month trip to Asia, with my boyfriend (now husband) Andrew. It was during this time that I began my journey towards seeking God with all of my heart. Although I had spent three months devouring the Bible, talking with God and listening to sermons on my Ipod during the long bus rides, the last month I sensed my heart communicating to me that something was missing. Although Andrew was a good listener, I had this unquenchable thirst for fellowship with other believers, who were as excited about God as I was. I wanted to be encouraged, mentored and inspired face to face with someone who was also unashamed of their faith in Christ. I wanted to be friends with someone who had zeal for God, a sister in Christ, who I could relate to, look up to, and to encourage me. However, given my circumstances, finding a English speaking friend in the non- touristy city of Cebu (Philippines) seemed impossible. After a few days of searching for this mystery friend on my own, I made my request known to God and trusted that if it was meant to be, then he would make it happen.

 “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God”- Philippians 4:6

 A few days later, an unexpected, yet divine intervention took place outside of the mall in downtown Cebu. Andrew literally bumped into the lady whom the Lord intended for us to meet. We shook hands with her and her son and couldn’t help but to be drawn to her charismatic friendly personality. She was one of those people who seem to be glowing with warmth, who you immediately feel drawn towards because you sense that they genuinely care about what you have to say. Her name was Ivy, and it didn’t take more than a few minutes for me to recognize that she was a woman of great faith in Christ. If anyone obeyed the command of Jesus, to ‘be the light’ in this world, she wore it best. A few times she said to us ‘Oh that is such a blessing of the Lord’ and ‘God Bless you two’. I felt the Holy Spirit urging me to ask her if she could show me where a good English speaking church is. I am so happy that I did because one thing led to another and before our conversation was over, we exchanged email’s and planned on meeting up the following week. As we walked away from one another, I knew that this woman was the answer to my prayers. A week later she invited me to her place to have dinner with her friend Sara and their pastor. The evening was filled with thanksgiving, praise, laughter and prayer. As I was getting ready to leave they encouraged me on my journey of faith, and prayed over me. A few days later her friend Sara took Andrew and I to her church and then later on we met up with Ivy for lunch and coffee. Before we parted ways, they prayed over us, and gave me a set of earrings and a bracelet to remember them by.

 I was so humbled, not because of the gifts they gave me, but because of the love that they showed to a perfect stranger in a foreign land. These women were truly a gift from God and they will forever be spiritual mentors in my life. I knew in my heart that the author of the universe had planned this meeting all along, to give me the desires of my heart, to be encouraged by other believers and ultimately to build my faith in Him. Praise God!

“Trust the Lord with all of your heart….” Proverbs (3:5)

Trusting God with even the littlest of things, like paying off debts, finding the right job, or meeting the right man in your life, can sometimes be difficult for us. I believe this is because, in today’s society we are trained to trust only in ourselves to obtain our wants and needs. However, this concept is contrary to the word of God. We are told not to trust in our self, but in everything we do, to put God first (Prov 3:6). Putting God first means that as soon as you come across temptation, trials, testing’s, or if you have a need or a deep desire, you will turn to God and ask for his help and rely on his divine council to break the barriers and receive his blessing. I can’t help but to wonder if I would have ever met Ivy if I didn’t first turn to God, make my request known to him, and trust that God would make it happen.

“…And lean not on your own understanding” – Proverbs (3:6 NIV)

 I love how God cautions us from ‘trying to figure it all out’ on our own. When our earthly minds try to come up with our own solutions, we limit the amount of faith in what we believe God can do in our situation. We tell our friends and family “I am just trusting God with so and so” yet we still continue to verbally map out our directions for Him, just in case the Creator doesn’t know how to meet our needs or solve our problems the way we would like. Hello!! This is not trusting God with all of our heart. In order to fully trust that God will provide, we need to humble ourselves, and admit that God’s plan for our life, is better than any plan we could ever think-up on our own. So even though God says ‘make your requests known Him”, we are commanded to immediately surrender our earthly ‘solutions’ of deliverance, and have faith that the all knowing God will take care of your every need according to His riches and glory (Phill 4:19). When I was in the non touristy part of the Philippines, I couldn’t  imagine how the desire of mine, to meet another female Christian believer, would ever be met. However, I knew that God keeps tabs on every one of his Children, and as soon as I rejected my ‘own understanding’ of how this request would be granted, God put this specific person smack dab in the middle of my path so that I couldn’t miss her, even if I was blind. Isn’t that amazing?. God is the author of this universe, he has tabs on you and I every second of our life.  I mean how cool is it, that God can just cross two peoples paths, to meet a need, to increase our faith and bring Him so much glory.

“If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask Him!”  Matt 7:11

Did you know the Bible says that one of the names God goes by is Jehovah Jireh. The Hebrew translation for this means God will provide. I Love this. We think that we know how to give good gifts to those we love, but God declares that he knows how to give us better gifts than our earthly parents, if we would only ask him. I’m not going to say that if you ask God for a million bucks that the next day you’re going to get a cheque in the mail, but what I am saying is that, if what you ask for is in line with the will of God, and His will for your life, you can have it. God knows what you need before you ask him, but He still says, to come to him with your requests and supplications and with thanksgiving he will give us the desires of our heart. God is your provider. I dare you to trust God with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding with whatever it is, that you need or desire. Ask, Believe, give Thanks, and Receive.

Praise God for the gift of friendship.  Ivy is one of the members of IWOF and I am so thankful that God has placed her in my life. She was one of the first women who inspired me to be a great woman of faith and our friendship will always be a reminder of Gods faithfulness to the promise He gives us in Proverbs 3:5-6.  Praise God!


What desire or need do you have that you have not yet submitted to the Lord? Are you trusting God with all of your heart or do you tend  trust in your own understanding?  Do you have faith that God alone can provide for your every need? What changes will you need to make, in order to trust God with all of your heart?

"It is time to seek the Lord" Hosea 10:12

I was thinking about when I first heard the phrase “God loves you”. Almost simultaneously, I was taken back to the earliest memories I had from church when I was 5 or 6 years old. I remembered feeling restless having to sit in the uncomfortable wooden pews, and listen to the angry preacher, who I thought resembled a taller version of my father. My eyes would often drift off the pulpit to the women who were, only minutes before, shouting and dancing like buffoons. I didn’t understand how they could, all of a sudden, be so calm and attentive.  Maybe it was because the preacher man was yelling at them. When my mother leaned over and whispered in my ear, I sat up straight, expecting that my fidgeting was distracting the others. “Do you know who God is?” she asked. To my childlike mind, this rang a bell and I was reminded of the “Where’s Waldo?” book. This indeed was a trick question. When my eyes tapered around the room, a sense of relief swept over my body as I located the man she was looking for in a matter of seconds. With poise I responded “Yes”. Just as fast as the word slipped off my tongue I pointed to the pastor who looked like my dad. “No” she said unsympathetically as she pushed my hand down. Shock had now replaced the pride I had felt seconds before. He wasn’t God? Then why are we here? Who is this man? And who is God? I asked myself.

 Reflecting on this memory makes me laugh at how naïve I was. It also paints a perfect picture of how many people, even new believers, still do not have a clear understanding of who God is. I am not saying that in our earthly minds, we can understand the complexity of God -just like the cornflakes I ate for breakfast can’t comprehend the totality of me. However, I believe our many attempts to understand God with our ‘head’ have only cheapened him. I can testify that for many years to follow, and many half hearted attempts, I continued to have a blurred vision of the character of God. Naturally, it was easier to believe in a man I could visibly see, to be God, than the reality that there is this invisible God, who required me to have ‘faith’ of his existence. Not only that, I would have to believe that he wanted a relationship with me through his Son Jesus. To be completely honest, it seemed less humiliating to think the pastor of my church was God when I was five, than to admit to myself that I still didn’t possess this intimate ‘relationship’ with Him, 15 years later.

There came a time in my life where I wanted to know why I believed what I did. I no longer wanted to take the preachers word for it. I was tired of hearing about the relationship that other people had with our Creator. I wanted to experience this so-called relationship, if it existed, on my own. I wanted to know him intimately, instead of knowing Him by association. I was tired of being spoon fed by others, (preachers, my parents, authors, blogsJ) It was time for me to take off my spiritual diapers and grow up. It was my time to find out for myself, who is God, and if this intimate relationship with Him exists.

“And you shall seek me, and find me, when you shall search for me with all your heart”  Jeremiah 29:13

When I made the decision to re-dedicate my life to Jesus (for the third time), I also made a commitment to seek God with all of my heart. I brought my handheld leather Bible with me on my four month trip to Asia, and devoted a portion of everyday to read it, starting from Genesis. At first, I viewed reading the small print as an assignment but not before long, finding time to read my Bible became my number one priority. I soon found myself skipping out on days at the beach, to find a comfy chair in a coffee shop, and discover the heart of my creator. I started to pen my thoughts, feelings, the verses that I liked, didn’t like, and the ones that I did not understand in my journal.  Then, to my surprise I began to notice something radical happening on the inside, on the level of my heart. It was like, all of a sudden the words of God were no longer floating around in my mind, but were unlocking the chambers of my heart, and filling it with a divine sense of wisdom. I started to feel him inside of me, I could see Him at work around me, and each day I would hear him speak to me through that inner voice. I can honestly say that my walk with God started to resemble the romantic feelings a couple gets at the beginning of a relationship. As I spent time with him, talking and listening, the butterflies, goose-bumps, and sheer excitement would flow through my body like a title wave of love. Like the highlight of most relationships, I was in cloud nine when He said that he loved me. The phrase God loves me, was no longer a head-truth, rather, it became a truth which pierced my heart to the point where nothing or nobody could ever convince me otherwise. I got to hear it and feel it from my Creator as He whispered it to my heart day after day and I was swept off my feet every single time. From this moment forward, I would never doubt or contradict the fact that God desires to woo me with his Love. And, for the first time in my life, I could honestly say that I loved him too.

“Ask and it shall be give to you, seek and you shall find; knock and the door shall be opened” Matthew 7:7

One morning, in Bali, I took a stroll down the white sandy beach just thanking God for everything that he had blessed me with. I knew He was listening to me, but for the past few days his presence seemed far away. As I dipped my feet into the ocean, I took a leap of faith, and asked Him to reveal himself to me. I said that it didn’t have to be right now, but if he so desired, to please send a reminder of His love for me. Later on in the evening, I went to the local coffee shop to read and write and it just so happened that while I was sitting there, my wish had been granted. God revealed himself to me through a song, the only song in the entire world that could have confirmed that His finger print was on it. As the sweet symphony echoed through all four speakers of the coffee shop, I was dumbfounded. This was OUR song. What I mean is that, this was the song I had dedicated to the Lord only months before. It wasn’t gospel, or popular, most people wouldn’t recognize it if they heard it, but every time I would play this song on my iPod, I would sing it to God, as though I had written the love lyrics myself.  I would have never in a million years, thought that I would hear this song in Asia and I knew better than to brush it off as a coincidence. This was God. The God-Bumps, hair-raising and warmth, swept over my body until I couldn’t contain my emotions. I unashamedly let tears of joy stream down my face as feelings of gratitude poured out of my heart. In response to my seeking heart, the Creator of the universe was expressing His inexhaustible love for me. As I sat there in awe, I sensed Him saying that he has longed for me to experience His love, and that he takes delight in giving me gifts like these.

 “If you love me, you will keep my commandments” John 4:15

My whole life I struggled with obeying the word of God. I always justified why my sins were harmless and argued that they weren’t hurting anyone. When I would pray, I always felt like I was going to God with my fingers crossed, knowing very well that the next day I intended to commit the exact same sins again. You see, I viewed God as this angry person, similar to the preacher back in my childhood church days. Even though I heard so many times growing up, “God loves you, He gave up his only son for you, so that you wouldn’t have to perish”. I didn’t feel it, this notion, failed to stir up my heart. As I got older, I was always on the fence about following Christ. I knew deep down that a relationship with God, a real relationship, carries responsibility. I didn’t want to have a close walk with God, because I knew that a part of me, a very large part of me wanted to hold onto the very things that were driving a wedge between me and Him. My sin.

 “If you don’t love somebody, it gets annoying when they tell you what to do or what to feel. When you love them, you get pleasure from their pleasure and it makes it easy to serve them. I didn’t love God because I didn’t know God” -   Donald Miller

 For many years of my life, God seemed like an irrelevant distant being to me. Like the quote above says, I didn’t love God because I didn’t know God. I didn’t ever take the time to know God, therefore I didn’t have a deep love for him, which is why I didn’t think my sins mattered in the big scheme of things. I believed the lie, in thinking, that God and I were as close as we were ever going to be, so why should I go the extra mile, and turn away from my sins. However, as soon as I set out on this mission to seek God with my whole heart, He was faithful to fulfill the second half of the Jeremiah 29:13. He revealed himself to me. The truth about His love changed the way I viewed Him and his commandments. One of the biggest revelations for me, was when I learned that when I choose to sin, I hurt God. I realized that He is hurt because the sin itself is hurting me. That is how deep the love of God runs for you and I. Let that sink in for just a second. When you sin, you are hurting God.

Do you love God? Or do you Love what God does for you?

For some people, the scripture above that says “If you love God, you will keep his commandments” is a hard pill to swallow. For many years, I choked on saying the very words I love you, to God, because I knew my actions proved otherwise. It is easy to openly say that we love what God did for us, ( Jesus dying on the cross)  just as easily as it is to say that we love what the cleaning lady does for our house every Monday. But we choke when it comes down to expressing those three words to God because we know that our actions speak louder than our words. Not only that, but how can we claim to love God if we don’t take the time to get to know him? Deep love for another person means you do not continue to do the very things that hurt them, but the exact opposite. But when we don’t have a deep desire to know God then you are missing out on the best part of following Christ, an intimate relationship, and the blessings that come with giving Him you’re very best.

 “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength”                             - Mark 29:11

The reason why it is so hard for some of us to obey the main commandment is because we haven’t made the commitment to getting to know God, to seek Him, with all of our heart. We think that this distance between us and God, is the way it is supposed to be. But its not. We were not made to do life alone without God, that’s what sin is, doing life on our own, without Him. Let’s take a look at some of the common misconceptions we have when it comes to building intimate relationships.

*It is impossible to deeply love somebody who you haven’t taken the time to get to know. I bet some of us have taken more interest in reading gossip mag’s to learn about the lives of celebrities rather than reading the Bible and learning about our Creator. The Bible is a giant love letter inspired by God himself, written for you and I.  

*How can we claim to have an intimate relationship with someone, but only really know them by association? If my friend was related to Julia Roberts, how stupid would it be if I used all of my friend’s stories as my own, and pretended that Julia and I were friends but I had never actually had a conversation with her before? Going to Church every Sunday, reading Christian books, and blogs may inspire us, but you can’t claim to have an intimate relationship with God simply by using other peoples experiences as your own. God is longing for you to experience his love and  taste the living water for yourself.

 *You can’t have a healthy relationship with someone, if you don’t allow the other person to have a chance to speak. Imagine if every time I invited you over for coffee, I would never let you get a word out, and every time that you tried to speak, I would cut you off and talk about myself again. There are two people involved in every relationship. God is waiting for you to pass the microphone to Him.  

 *You can’t claim to be friends with someone just by reading a book about them. I couldn’t claim to know Suzanne Summers personally just because I read a Bibliography about her. Reading the Bible alone will not make you closer to God. Many theologians have read the Bible and still came out unmoved. God wants you to know about him through the Bible, but he desires real conversation from both ends as well.

 “You will seek the LORD your God, and you will find Him if you search for Him with all your heart and all your soul”-  Deut 4:29

 I can honestly say that if I did not set out to seek God with all of my heart I would not be writing these words today. I would have still been the same half-hearted, lukewarm, unstable Christian, sitting on the fence counting the costs of following Christ with reckless abandon.  I am so thankful that I put Gods word to the test, because He is faithful to his promises. He did reveal himself to me. I no longer have to read the testimonies of other women and feel left out, or wish I had the same relationship as them. Getting to know the author of this Universe, and inevitably falling in love with him, has changed my life completely. And I am thrilled to declare that I have my own authentic relationship with Him.  

 “God looks down from heaven on the children of man to see if there are any who understand, who seek after Him”- Psalm 53:2

Ladies, I don’t write this to you to brag about this ‘love relationship’ that I have with God. I do not put it on display as an example of how your relationship with God should be. But I tell you of this journey of mine to give hope to those of you who have not yet experienced the love of God. I encourage those of you who have not already, to make a commitment today, to seek God with all of your heart and soul. God is looking down from heaven, as I write this, into your heart, to see if any of you desire a relationship with him.  Let that sink in, God desperately wants to have a deep, authentic, intimate relationship with you. He wants you to know about him, He wants you to talk to him and He wants you to listen so that he can talk to you. God is just waiting for you to give him the opportunity to woo you, to sweep you off your feet and to express his immeasurable love for you. As with any, there is no short-cuts to building a intimate relationship with God and I can’t write out some special formula to guarantee that you are seeking him with all your heart. But what I can tell you is that God sees your heart, he knows exactly the amount of effort you putting into your relationship with him. Let’s put it this way, if you’re currently only giving God the last two minutes of your day before you fall asleep, mid-prayer, you can expect that your relationship won’t grow. God isn’t just some genie in a bottle who we rub when we want things; He made himself flesh (Jesus) so that He could walk with you and I, every moment of our lives.

As a result of reading this, I hope that you believe that God desperately wants a deeper relationship with you. His words are not spoken in vain, my friends, He will honor his word, and will reveal himself to you. So get excited, make the decision today, and seek God with all of your heart, soul, mind and strength.

“When you will call upon me and come and pray to me I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart” Jeremiah 29:13

Spiritual Swirling and Divine Dancing.

The religious feelings in the room were silenced when the guitar player boldly declared, “It’s not worship unless you strain a muscle!” Even though laughter filled the air, truth pierced my heart.

My mind wanted to come up with a thousand reasons for why this statement isn’t really true.

Worship can be a quiet and reflective time with God. It is moments where my spirit and my mind are actively engaged in contemplating His goodness, provision, and grace. I sit in silence before Him or whisper words of adoration. My songs flow from my lips, but more importantly they resonate in my heart. I am worshiping God in reverence and honor…in the secret of my heart.

Although I can list plenty of proof that worship is an internal turning of my heart towards my King, there is still something missing. Worship is definitely a soft and gentle demonstration of my love for God, but there is more! I can easily turn my inner man to the voice of God; this seems to be the simple and non-sacrificial part of praise for me.

But deep in my spirit, there is an explosion happening. Below the surface of my quiet and reserved nature towards God is a heart bursting with love and thankfulness for my Savior.

Jesus tells us, “The most important commandment…you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength. {Mark 12:30} It’s easy to exalt God with my heart and even my mind. But with my soul and strength, now that makes worship a challenging experience for me.

God tells me the best thing to give Him in worship is not only my mind and heart, but also my soul. God wants to be loved with every part of me- my crazy emotion, passion, and devotion.

To worship with all my strength is even more radical and out of my comfort zone. This means my worship is going to make noise, it’s going to be expressed. It’s not going to be locked away in the depths of my heart but on display through my actions, through dance, through the movement of my body.

From the moment God turned my life around, I remember I had the insatiable urge to dance. I would leap down the hallways of my house shouting my freedom. I would jump on my bed singing of my deliverance. It was my natural response to a supernatural God. 

However, through the years, the cares, worries, and lies of this life have quenched that part of worship for me. I am careful not to reach out my hands to high on a Sunday morning; I wouldn’t want to block anyone’s view of the words on the screen. I don’t want to jump to high, for fear I might offend someone or look like a complete fool. I don’t want to sing too loud; I know everyone doesn’t need to hear me, especially when I’m off pitch. So I remain tame, normal, somewhat cool, calm, and collected about God?!

Out of a genuine concern for people and a desire to not rock the boat or cause someone to think I am putting on a show- I hold back. I don’t put everything I am into praise. I don’t worship in complete abandonment. I yield only part of who I am.

Worship is not just an internal turning, but an outward expression. It will be seen. Worship declares God’s worthiness throughout the world. If every fiber in our being is worshiping, then...

people.
will.
see.


We can't hide our surrender.

I see nothing in the Psalms of half-hearted, toe-tapping, hushed whispered worship. Instead all I read is of holy hip-hop, divine dancing, clanging cymbals, and spiritual swirling.

Worship happens in the presence of people; it is published among the nations. Even nature moves to the rhythm of their Creator, so why can’t we?

There is time for waiting patiently, quietly pursuing, and tenderly praising, but we must take off the shackles of culture, personality, and tradition if we are too absolutely abandon ourselves to God. Worshiping in authentic passion and abandonment is so attractive to the heart of God.

Preparing our hearts for worship might need to include a little more stretching.

Sweat on our foreheads and straining a muscle is not just limited to physical exercise!

So wiggle your foot, tap your toe, shake your arm, and jiggle your bum. Do whatever you need to do to awaken your soul and stir up your strength to truly worship the Lord!

What do you think about worshiping God with all your soul and strength, is it difficult for you too?

Guilt, Sin & Condemnation

Not too long ago I was continually beating myself up for saying and doing the very things which I vowed not to do. Things like, raising my voice when my husband and I are having an argument, talking negatively about my husband’s manager, mentally criticizing my body and comparing it to other women’s bodies etc. I hoped that these bad habits would just disappear once I admitted that they were indeed sin. However, it seemed the more determined I was to overcome these bad habits on my own the more I gave into them. I started to feel hopeless; the way a gardener would feel if she were to wake up one morning to a garden jam-packed with weeds instead of the flowers she was sure she saw budding a few days before. I literally wanted to run away, but Instead, I distracted myself with anything and everything to keep me from turning to the inner voice inside that I sensed would lead me to repent for my sins and receive Gods grace. The truth was, I didn’t feel like asking for forgiveness for the same thing over and over, I was starting to feel like a broken record. Why should I get another chance, I knew that while I was doing those things that they were wrong. How can I, be a so called 'born again' Christian, yet still habitually fall into the same sin temptations?

 Can anyone relate to this? Have you ever ‘vowed not to do something’ or ‘be better tomorrow’ only to find yourself doing the exact thing you promised you weren’t going to do? Well I got my revelation on this subject just weeks following the shame-guilt-condemnation party I was throwing for myself. To my surprise, I found out that the apostle Paul had the same struggle as I did. In his own words, he says

“I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do, I do not do, but what I hate I do….For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do-this I keep on doing” (Romans 7:17-19)

 Paul is talking about his current spiritual condition and describing his attitude towards sin (he does not want to sin, and he hates sin), yet he continues to do the very things that he does not want to do. Finally! Somebody who understands what I am going through. How could I have not known that one of the most devoted apostles of Jesus struggled with the very same character flaw as I was struggling with. Let’s see what Paul says next.

“Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is the sin living in me that does it” (Romans 7:20)

Wow. Okay so If Paul says that it is not him who sins, then who sins? Well ladies, I think it’s time for Christian vocabulary lesson 101. Basically, we are all born sinners. The Bible says that no-one is without sin.(Rom 3:23) We can thank Adam and Eve for that. So because we were born with this ‘sin nature’, it is our natural fleshly desire to do things that are contrary to God’s will. We want to stare at the super skinny woman walking down the street and criticize, compare and envy her all at the same time. Our flesh wants to gossip with everyone else about the new employee at work who smells bad and whose outfits never match. It’s our flesh who sometimes imagines really horrible things happening to our enemies.

However, when we are Born Again (accept Jesus as our Lord and Savior), we are given the gift of the Holy Spirit to help deliver us out of the temptations that our ‘sinful nature’ desires. This is why we feel ‘convicted’ by the Holy Spirit, when we do something that is contrary to the Word of God. As paul described, even though the Holy Spirit is alive and active in us, we still live in a flawed body that is a slave to the sinful desires of our flesh.

Do you get it? So it is like we have two people living inside of us waging war against one another. The Spirit is leading us towards life and righteousness, and the flesh has its own evil desires which inevitably lead to death. So what Paul is saying is, stop beating yourself up. It is not the real you who is doing it, it is the sin that is living in you that does it out of habit. If your attitude towards sin is that of a believer (you hate sin, you don’t want to do it) then don’t condemn yourselves, you are on the right path.

“So you see how it is: my new life tells me to do right, but the old nature that is still inside me loves to sin” Romans 7:21-23

Hah. Well said Paul. I feel the same way. Just the other day I was feeling supernaturally filled with joy and I was telling my husband how I felt so connected to the H.S. Seconds later, Andrew told me that before he left the gym his teammates were saying something in Czech to him to bug him. He later found out they were saying “Say Hi to your sexy wife, bla bla bla”. Just as fast as the words came off of his tongue, the rush of flattery went straight to my ego and my mind instantly began planning what outfit I would wear to his next game to maintain this new profile as Andrews ‘sexy wife’. So pathetic, I know. But thank God I was feeling connected to the Holy Spirit that day because I was soon reminded that ‘seeking male attention’ is a part of my past, my old self, my ‘sinful nature’. I’m not going to lie, it took a minute or two to slay the egotistical thought but as soon as I did, I was able to redirect my thoughts to the man sitting next to me and give thanks to God for blessing me with such a wonderful husband.

So now that we know that there is indeed a battle to feed our ‘sinful nature’ that rages within Christ followers, Is there any hope? Does sin always defeat the sons and daughters of God? Of course not. Paul says,

 “Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? Thank God the answer is found in Jesus Christ our Lord” (Romans 7:24-25 NLT)

  Jesus Christ has died for our sins and even though we are in this fleshly, decomposing, sin-filled-nature of a body, if we have received the Holy Spirit then we are no longer slaves to sin. He paid the price, so that we are delivered from condemnation. Paul says,   

“There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1)

How could I have so easily forgotten this biblical truth? After reading this I sensed the Lord speaking to me through his Holy Spirit, saying “Jaycee, even when you are failing, and falling into the temptation of sin, I still accept you and love you more than you could ever imagine. Don’t hide from your mistakes, but come to me and I will cleanse you, trust in me and I will make your paths straight. Whether or not you see it, I am changing you from glory to glory”. I was so humbled to feel 100% accepted for who I am by this Amazing God. However, I wondered why I my first instincts were to run away from God, time after time, when I would fail in my attempts to be good. Of course, I had to go back to the beginning.

Just as I had thought. The sin cycle of tormenting ourselves with guilt, shame, and condemnation come from none other than our great ancestors Adam and Eve. The very first thing Adam and Eve did after they ate the forbidden fruit (which was against the will of God) in the Garden of Eden was try to run away from God, and hide from Him. In the words of Adam “I hid from you because I was afraid”. He was afraid of God because He knew he had done the very thing he knew he was not supposed to do. Rightfully so, I would be afraid to be the first human being to commit the first sin. However, because of the ultimate sacrifice Jesus made, we are called to come boldly to the throne of grace. Yet, for some of us, we still insist on running away, or hiding from God when we screw up and this is because we mistakenly think that God is the one heaping the guilt, shame and condemnation on us. However, this couldn’t be further than the truth. I love the way John Burke, Author or “Soul Revolution” puts it:

“God does what he does in Christ, so that if we’re willing to receive it, we can know that even as we fail, He doesn’t leave us or condemn us….but if we are afraid God condemns us, we will hide from him and fall farther away”

Ladies, do not fall into the enemy’s trap of accepting the feelings of guilt, condemnation and shame. These are all lies, and it is one of the oldest tricks in the enemy’s book to get us to stay disconnected from God. Why? Because when we are disconnected from God, we will, out of habit, give into our sin nature, Instead of running towards God and trusting in His Holy Spirit to change us.

So where does this leave us?

Let’s take you on a trip down memory lane. Particularly to those of you who participated in the “Stop-Gossip Challenge”. Almost everyone who overcame the temptation to gossip, one time or another throughout their week, confessed that in those moments they were fully connected to the Holy Spirit. They could hear the gentle warning when they were about to be tempted, and it was in those moments that they chose to follow the guidance of the Holy Spirit. A few of the women said, that even when they did (out of habit) dabble in gossip they could feel the Holy Spirit reminding them that what they were doing was wrong. Back to what Paul said previously, when you gave into the very sin in which you hate to do, it is your sinful nature that does it, and not the ‘real you’ who does it. Again, don't beat yourself up!

So is Paul giving us excuses to sin, and saying that I can consciously sin, and not feel bad about it because I know that God will forgive me? Of course not, and Paul addresses this by saying “So should we continue in our sin, so that grace may abound? No, God forbid” (Romans 6:15) . You aren't going to recieve peace or forgiveness for robbing a bank if you fully intend on robbing another bank the next day. God's word can not be mocked. He knows our intentions and as knows our attitude towards sin. As it is written "Men looks at the outward appearance, but God looks at our heart". (1 Sam 16:7). There is no loopholes when it comes to obeying the word of God so don’t even think about it sister.

So here is where our 'intentions' come into play

Paul says, “For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the spirit, have their minds set on what the spirit desires” (Romans 8:5)

The moments in which each woman overcame the temptation to gossip, occurred when they were connected to that inner voice. They had intentionally set their minds on what the Spirit desired. It is only then, that we can overcome temptation. Trying harder simply won’t work. When we are disconnected to the Holy Spirit (we don't intentionally seek his guidance), we will, out of habit give into the sinful nature that lives in us and naturally have our minds set on the things of the flesh. It is a Biblical fact.

                                                     Conclusion

What Paul has taught me, and now you, is that yes, even as Christians, at times, we will sin, for all the reasons stated above. (Sinful nature, desires of our flesh, being born into a corrupt world, etc) Yet, if we are led by the Holy Spirit, like I was that day in the car with my husband, and like the women who succeeded throughout the week in the stop-gossip challenge, we learned that we can overcome such temptations. Even when we fail, and do the very sin we hoped not to do, for example, the women who failed throughout the week in the Stop-Gossip challenge. We know that we are still on the right path towards righteousness no matter how many times we, out of habit, give into that sin, because it was our attitude toward sin that matters, not the sin itself.  So please remember, that God is not wagging his finger from the clouds of heaven every time you screw up. No, He is saying 'Come to me as you are, we need to work together, you cannot overcome the sinful nature on your own, you need to walk with me, and stay connected to me'. It is through the sacrifice of Jesus, that we have hope in overcoming the very sins that dominate over us. Women of faith now understand that Victory over our sinful nature comes by intentionally re-directing our minds towards following the guidance of the Holy Spirit that dwells inside of us.

The Stop-Gossip Challenge Revealed

A week ago the I.W.O.Faith Crew was challenged to do their best to stop gossiping. They were asked to record the details about where they were, who they were with, why they were tempted, and what they did as a result of the temptation. Did they give in? Or did they use some particular stop-gossip tools to help resist the temptation? If they succeeded or failed in their attempts to stop-gossip, how did it make them feel? Let’s see how they did.

*Please feel free to comment below each Woman of Faith’s testimony if you can relate to that person’s struggles, would like to offer words of encouragement, or because you were inspired by their personal experiences.

Emma S. – Sundsvall, Sweden

I participated in this challenge because I think it's a really good thing for all of us, gossip needs to be stopped, or at least taken down more than a bit.
So my strongest experience of this was when me and a very close friend of mine were sitting down at school talking about pretty much everything, like we normally do. Then there is this other girl who we are/used to be pretty tight with, who is sort of fading out from the "group" so to speak, for no particular reason, it just happens you know. So this friend I was with started gossiping about this other girl, saying things like "she really buggs me, I can't stand it much longer and so on". So I kind of took a stand, saying she wasn't that much of a pain in the a**, that's she's actually pretty decent, keeping it at a lower level so I wouldn’t make a big deal out of it, then I just changed the subject. I mean I was pretty tempted to gossip because what the friend I was with was saying about the other girl wasn't coming from nowhere, but it still wasn't fully true. After all, the other girl was still my friend. The girl who was gossiping is not normally a gossiper, so when she says anything like that she really means it. However, it felt great to not get into any of this whole gossiping-thing, and afterwards I just felt marvelous.
This challenge was SO good, I mean it really made me realize how much people are actually gossiping, it's scary. Now that I was in it, I just hear it all over. Whenever my friends were gossiping this past week, just a tiny but or whatever, I most often just said nothing or changed the subject. And yes, a big yes, I felt the Holy Spirit telling me not to say anything in those situations. I am definitely up for doing this for way way longer. Maybe for life. Hopefully.
Thank you so much for inviting me to do this!